New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Randomize
