OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
