He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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