physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
