we have officially lost it.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Girls should come with a carfax report
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
You left your underwear on the fireplace
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Randomize
