i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize