Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize