i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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