my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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