I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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