we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
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