kristin has been a bad kristin
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
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