I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
thus making me awesome and them whores
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
