She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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