Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning? http://tfl.nu/o1k1
  Replies (39) Good night (4016) Bad night (1708)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex http://tfl.nu/q8xg
  Replies (28) Good night (4383) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i think i scared a bird with my dick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): i think i scared a bird with my dick http://tfl.nu/1tdx
  Replies (20) Good night (4544) Bad night (1063)
• Favorite

  (819): View more from Quebec

  I woke up to her vacumming the grass

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (819): I woke up to her vacumming the grass http://tfl.nu/p4j1
  Replies (18) Good night (5349) Bad night (1060)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing. http://tfl.nu/dzgt
  Replies (48) Good night (12677) Bad night (1553)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless. http://tfl.nu/v2dr
  Replies (36) Good night (4467) Bad night (1201)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes http://tfl.nu/frgb
  Replies (9) Good night (4006) Bad night (981)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Champagne is a vitamin, right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): Champagne is a vitamin, right? http://tfl.nu/gkox
  Replies (4) Good night (2246) Bad night (956)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night. http://tfl.nu/p7qx
  Replies (1) Good night (1418) Bad night (800)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch http://tfl.nu/vf66
  Replies (3) Good night (2357) Bad night (595)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.

  (801): View more from Utah

  Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (239): Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down. (801): Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible. http://tfl.nu/w6b2
  Replies (5) Good night (2142) Bad night (596)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts http://tfl.nu/oqnb
  Replies (8) Good night (2028) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles http://tfl.nu/axk7
  Replies (0) Good night (982) Bad night (362)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you http://tfl.nu/ds9i
  Replies (1) Good night (387) Bad night (171)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies! http://tfl.nu/zfby
  Replies (9) Good night (323) Bad night (554)

Randomize