Pappa wants mamma naked
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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