i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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