I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
