just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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