just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
