Texts From Last Night

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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.

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  (608): I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name. http://tfl.nu/o57y
  Replies (23) Good night (1700) Bad night (510)
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  (+44): View more from England

  Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.

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  (+44): Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock. http://tfl.nu/vs51
  Replies (110) Good night (1077) Bad night (13524)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life

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  (816): dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life http://tfl.nu/cejd
  Replies (11) Good night (3337) Bad night (767)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers

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  (317): I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers http://tfl.nu/7izq
  Replies (31) Good night (5387) Bad night (613)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator

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  (469): you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator http://tfl.nu/bsby
  Replies (21) Good night (7202) Bad night (1543)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Even my vagina gasped.

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  (515): Even my vagina gasped. http://tfl.nu/5sis
  Replies (15) Good night (5149) Bad night (993)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night

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  (978): How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night http://tfl.nu/80v5
  Replies (7) Good night (828) Bad night (1952)
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  (226): View more from Ontario

  This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex

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  (226): This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex http://tfl.nu/70co
  Replies (7) Good night (1850) Bad night (973)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that

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  (630): Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that http://tfl.nu/h45m
  Replies (4) Good night (1637) Bad night (651)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw

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  (303): Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw http://tfl.nu/554g
  Replies (10) Good night (2100) Bad night (914)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.

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  (416): I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing. http://tfl.nu/fg17
  Replies (2) Good night (524) Bad night (915)
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  (949): View more from California

  am i gonna have visuals on this?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire

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  (949): am i gonna have visuals on this? (414): you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire http://tfl.nu/3sug
  Replies (13) Good night (1625) Bad night (487)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  Did you watch the carolina game tonight?

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  (803): i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;) (1-803): Did you watch the carolina game tonight? http://tfl.nu/ae37
  Replies (18) Good night (2237) Bad night (847)
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  (518): View more from New York

  No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?

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  (518): No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark? http://tfl.nu/5sw5
  Replies (2) Good night (310) Bad night (555)
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  (562): View more from California

  Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.

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  (562): Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works. http://tfl.nu/5yc6
  Replies (3) Good night (165) Bad night (466)

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