what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize