She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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