I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
