I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
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