doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
The uberlube is also flammable
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
