I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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