problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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