She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?