I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
