You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
