But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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