I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
