She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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