we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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