Pregnant stripper...not hot.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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