help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
