"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
