last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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