that's an acceptable place to lick
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
