I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
