he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
