Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Randomize