At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
