On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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