she was so not down for the gang bang
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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