I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
