The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
My vagina is very pro this idea
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
