She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I just blew my weed a kiss
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Randomize
