i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
