she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
